Monday, September 5, 2011

My Favorite Ice Cream

I wanted to write a post about my favorite dessert, but I decided not to. I don’t want the other desserts to think I don’t love them. The desserts and I came to a compromise, I’ll stick to ice cream and they’ll go on believing they’re all my favorite. Kind of like a mom with four kids.

The best ice cream on the planet is Graeter’s ice cream. Graeter’s makes Ben and Jerry’s look like that crap that comes in the two gallon vat from Wal-Mart. One pint of Graeter’s weighs in at a whopping  full pound. Ben and Jerry’s comes in at a measly eight ounces. Why the discrepancy? Butter fat. Butter fat is what makes ice cream melty, creamy, smoothy delicious. Graeter’s boasts 18% butter fat, B&J 14%. Naturally the Graeter’s calorie count reflects this added fat. Do I care? Hell to the no!! I don’t survive on a diet of Graeter’s ice cream. I eat it very rarely. I can indulge once or twice or ten times a week. 

Pumpkin pie ice cream?
Graeter's pumpkin pie ice cream?
Oh Lord give me strength.
Where can you purchase this delectable carton of yumminess? Until recently you had to live in Ohio or Kentucky to experience this sweet ambrosia of the gods. You could order it by mail. The minimum order was six pints and it cost about eighty bucks to have those six pints delivered to you. I am not ashamed to say that I have spent $80 on six pints of ice cream more than once.  However, now you can buy Graeter’s at grocery stores all over the country!! This is the best news I’ve received since the doctor told me my child had been born healthy and whole. You think I’m kidding. I’m not. I am an ice cream connoisseur. Of course this also means that in the next few months I’ll have to throw out my wardrobe and buy everything a few sizes larger, but that’s a small price to pay to feast on the food that forces even God to cheat on his diet.

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